Build Up Your Self Confidence

"God helps those who help themselves" -though not scriptural, it emphasizes the need to be confident, because only a confident person has the guts to face adversities, risk, curiosity, wonder, spontaneous delight, or any other experience that reveals the human spirit.

Self confidence gives us the freedom to commit mistakes and cope with failure without making us feel worthless. If we have confidence in ourselves, we gain confidence of others. After all, most people are reluctant to back a project that's being pitched by someone who is nervous, fumbling and overly apologetic. On the other hand, you might be persuaded by someone who spoke clearly, who held his or her head high, who answered questions assuredly, and who readily admitted when they did not know something.

The good news is that self confidence can be learned and built on.

All you have to do is try and implement the following given tips in your day to day life.

1) Recognize your insecurities: we all have insecurities in life. It can be anything from acne to regrets, to friends at school. Giving a name to the things which make you feel unworthy, ashamed or inferior helps to combat them. You can try to pen down your thoughts and you will find that it makes you feel much lighter and happier. Remember that no one is perfect. The man or woman sitting next to you might have the same amount of insecurities as you have. If writing doesn't come easily to you, you might want to talk it out with your friends or loved ones. Sharing your thoughts will help relieve the burden you have been carrying alone.

2) Identify your successes: no matter how insecure you might feel, God has blessed each one of us with some talent. Discover the things you are good at and then focus on improving them. Give yourself permission to take pride in your talents. Give yourself credit for your successes. Inferiority is a state of mind in which you've declared yourself a victim. Do not allow yourself to be victimized.

3) Be thankful for what you have: a lot of the times, at the root of insecurity and lack of confidence is a feeling of not having enough of something, whether it's emotional validation, luck, money, etc. By acknowledging and appreciating what you do have, you can combat the feeling of being incomplete and unsatisfied. Finding that inner peace will do wonders for your confidence.

4) Be positive: avoid self-pity or sympathy of others. Never allow others to make you feel inferior - they can only do so if you let them. If you continue to loathe and belittle yourself, others are going to do and believe likewise. Instead, speak positively about yourself, your future, your progress. Do not be afraid to project your strengths and qualities to others.

5) Dress sharp: although clothes don't make the man, they certainly affect the way he feels about himself. When you don't look good, you don't feel good. It changes the way you carry yourself and interact with people. This doesn't mean you need to spend a fortune on clothes. Rather than buying a bunch of cheap clothes, buy half as many selected, high quality items. In long run this decreases spending because expensive clothes wear out less easily and stay in style longer than cheap clothes.

6) Walk faster: your pace tells a lot about your personality. Is it slow? Tired? Painful? Or is it energetic and purposeful? People with confidence walk quickly. They have places to go, people to see, important work to do. You can increase your self confidence by putting some pep in your step. Walking 25% faster will make to you look and feel more important.

7) Compliment other people: when we think negatively about ourselves, we often project that feeling on to others in the form of insults and gossip.Refuse to engage in backstabbing gossip and make an effort to compliment those around you. In the process, you'll become well liked and build up your self-confidence. By looking for the best in others, you indirectly bring out the best in yourself.

8) Take the front seat: backbenchers might seem to have a lot of fun in schools and colleges, but that does nothing to boost their self confidence. Don't be afraid to get noticed. By deciding to sit in the front row, you can get over your irrational fear of getting noticed and build up your self confidence.

9) Speak up: it's a general observation that many people are afraid to speak or ask questions in a group discussion or a public gathering. They are afraid that they might be judged for saying something stupid. Generally, people are much more accepting than we imagine. In fact, most people are dealing with the exact same fears. By making an effort to speak up at least once in every group discussion, you'll become a better public speaker, more confident in your own thoughts, and recognized as a leader by your peers.

10) Work out: a healthy mind resides in a healthy body. If you are fit, you are surrounded by positivity and energy. If you are out of shape, you feel unattractive. This leads to demoralization. Just a little discipline in your life can help shape up your self confidence a lot.

11) Smile, last but not least: try to smile as much as possible. People are always appreciative of a smiling face. You will be welcomed by anyone who comes in your contact. A smiling face is always received with warmth and affection. Acceptance and recognition from others helps in building self confidence.

So where do you rate yourself on the scale for your confidence level?

culled from naij.com

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